"What if I don't go back to the office on Monday?": When will your life improve and when is it reckless

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By Eva Carnero

To clean the slate is not a simple matter. Rather the complete opposite. Substituting a good job for a vocation with uncertain profitability or leaving the city that gave birth to a distant and strange place, it seems,a prioriDecisions closer to the arbitrary reasoning of a madman than to the thoughts of a sensible and intelligent human being. However, testimonies such as those of Adelaida, Javier, Ana and Guillermo, sow doubt and cause the balance to tip towards the riskier side of life.

“They have made us believe that we cannot choose, that what we have is what we have been given. But it is not true. Although it sounds utopian, deciding what you want to do with your life is possible, "says Adelaida, who along with her current partner, Javier, left what in theory should never be abandoned: the security of a stable and well-paid job. However, his dreams did not correspond to reality. So they made some decisions. Few, but definitive.

Thecrux The question is in the freedom of being able to decide at any time what will be the next step that we are going to take. This is also the case of Guillermo and Ana, two young people who today earn their living working the land as farmers, and a few years ago they did it in front of the computer, as an engineer and administrative worker. At one point, they decided to wrap the blanket around their heads and start over. To do this, they had to learn everything about tomatoes, lettuce, onions and padrón peppers: how to grow them, sell them and distribute them. It was not an easy thing. “We had no idea of ​​this world,” they both comment: “However, being able to make our own decisions about work and schedules, and, above all, the illusion of starting something of our own from scratch, was the key to moving to Nigrán , in Pontevedra, and create A Leira de Lola ”, a vegetable garden that sells baskets of organic vegetables.

Wasn't freedom utopian?

“Adelaida showed me a new path, the outline of a vital path that I did not know. I asked myself new questions about life and, from that moment, a few weeks were enough for us to materialize the decision to change course ”. This is how Javier is explained, a 48-year-old from Almeria living in A Coruña and an architect in the Department of International Works at Inditex. The person responsible for this change, a 36-year-old from Madrid and with a 10-year-old boy, invested almost all her time in textile sales work in the same company. Ultimately, both enjoyed the advantages of a permanent job and a good economic reward. Then why? A crazy idea crossed your heads? For Adelaida, taking that step of leaving everything was the only way to be free and lead the life they wanted. “So we decided to focus on our talents, what we like and are passionate about,” he says. This meant that Javier changed architecture for navigation and, more specifically, for organizing boat trips; while Adelaide became one of the fewprofessional organizer of our country (people who help organize the lives of their clients, from the closet to the domestic economy), with the creation of the company Orden Studio, with which it tries to communicate that "leading an orderly life represents the guarantee of having a balanced environment and a harmonious existence ”. Despite the fears and doubts, the couple recognizes that they are where they want to be, "assuming what we like and what not about the decision made," says Adelaida on behalf of both of them.

Ask yourself: does inertia take me?

All four stopped making sense of business trips, the stress of meeting someone else's goals, and racing against the clock to nowhere (or, at least, not to where they wanted to be). The mismatch between the reality they were living and the one they longed for was the definitive trigger that encouraged them to shelve one stage and begin the next. A generalized symptom among those who bet on a vital change, although not the only one.

The signs that alert us that we are exhausting a cycle can be of a very diverse nature. However, they all identify themselves in the same way: “The moment we detect a lack of enthusiasm or motivation to carry out the tasks that have been entrusted to us, an alarm goes off to which we must pay close attention”, warns Leticia Prada,coach Expert in Emotional Intelligence, who advises: "If we cannot resolve this situation, we must look up and explore new horizons with different goals and challenges that motivate us to enjoy our work." And he adds: "If we enjoy what we do, we will have guaranteed success."

To boredom and the absence of illusion, the psychologist Miguel Silveira, author of the bookChange is possible! (Alba Editorial), adds some more reasons that tend to trigger professional turns in people's trajectories: “In addition to demotivation, the fact of being immersed in a stifling and rarefied work environment can be the origin of a decision of this type . On the other hand, many people start a process of change when they are offered or see such attractive opportunities outside the company that they believe they should not pass up ”.

Experts recommend not rushing. What is outside is not always better than what we already have. And to see if this is the case, Silveira proposes asking yourself two key questions whose answers will help confirm or refute your initial impulse: Do I work by inertia? Do I have alternatives ready? These are questions that the expert believes we should ask ourselves in our internal forum. But, is it convenient to also have the opinion of others? For the psychologist, “doing so denotes prudence, but it is not essential. Consulting allows to increase the objectivity of the perception of the new reality, since others will see the matter with more distance and can give us a different and complementary vision to ours ”. For its part, Prada emphasizes the idea that, "although listening to the opinion of others is always enriching, in the end, the decision we make must be made under our responsibility."

Beware of impulses

Illusion to live doing what we like, fear of the uncertainty of the day after, confidence in our potential capabilities, anxiety to continue with the same taskssine die… An accumulation of sensations influences to leave everything or to continue with the same song. And emotions tend to outweigh logic, so you have to be careful, because you must not forget that impulses can be treacherous. To ensure the shot or, at least, increase the guarantees of success, thecoach appeals to pragmatism and encourages "making a preliminary analysis of our current situation and the real possibilities of the path that we intend to follow in the future." And he adds: "It is not about changing for the sake of change, but about improving the conditions in which we live."

Precisely, to avoid this leap into the void and to face an abrupt reality, Silveira points out that “the best strategy is to keep in mind that change is inherent in any area of ​​life and you have to be open to it, without fear. This requires developing a good ability to adapt to the unfolding of events, constantly acquire new skills and foster creativity in problem solving ”.

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Video: SHS Personal Development Q3 Ep3 Development Stages in Middle u0026 Late Adolescence (June 2022).


  1. Abbas

    This question is not clear to me.

  2. Anthor

    I have a similar situation. Let's discuss.

  3. Sharif

    Agree, this remarkable message

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